For the last couple of years, there has been little opportunity for me to reflect on or really engage in the holiday season -- Thanksgiving and Christmas. I was usually in the middle of a mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical "marathon" that ended up with me in a semi-catatonic state by the time Christmas rolled around. I spent most of Thanksgiving last year in bed sick for 3 days! I'm thankful to NOT be sick this year (in fact, I've only been sick ONCE since then! Thank You, Jesus!)
When I helped to lead the Father's House discipleship school in South Africa, my friend Clare would always teach on thankfulness. At the end of her talk, she'd loudly play music and have us all shout out to God what we were thankful for, for at least 10 minutes. It was an "every man/woman for him/her self" kind of a thing, and you'd hear what the people around you were thanking God for. We hit every area in life and everything we could think of. One of my favorites is one of the students saying, "I'm thankful for my hair!" complete with actions, enthusiastically running his fingers through his hair and pulling it to stand straight up. He did have nice hair.
Thankfulness is really an amazing thing. Have you ever been incredibly thankful for hot, running water? Not because you've just spent some time in Mozambique where running water and hot water are rarities, but because you just decided to thank God for it every time you took a shower, realizing that it's a privilege that most of humanity hasn't enjoyed. And then eventually the mental reasoning of thankfulness becomes thankfulness from the heart: Wow. I actually get to enjoy hot, running water!!
Sometimes thankfulness is hard when disappointments or trials or losses come. (And maybe a waning of thankfulness feeds the feeling of disappointment.) We all get hit by them in one way or another. Mixed in with all the amazing experiences and opportunities and things God has done has also been, since March of 2015, pretty steady stream of disappointments, trials, and losses -- more than I'd ever experienced before. The challenge has been, and my question for myself, can I find Jesus in the middle of it all? When even a good thing feels like a consolation prize. Can I still trust Him, know and believe that He's good, that He's with me, that He won't forsake me, that He's faithful, and thank Him for it all, even for the difficult things that I don't like, because He's greater than it all, He can (and will) use it to make me more like Him, and He'll be glorified in it?
In the midst of seeing hopes and dreams and vision die, even things I strongly felt like He said, can I surrender it to Him, try to get a glimpse of eternity and Heaven, and trust in the One Who is the Resurrection and the Life? And then pause to remember what He has done. How He left the ease and comfort of Heaven for this challenging place called earth and died for me. For His amazing mercy, grace, love, nearness, and faithfulness. For my family and friends. For the people He's let me see with His eyes. For the beauty of His creation that He's allowed me to see. For the time I told Him I needed Him to protect, defend, and provide for me, He came through in mere hours. For how He's provided a job, a place to stay, a vehicle, food and coff... I mean water. And hot running water. And yes, for coffee.
Thank Daddy for being so good, for being faithful, for always pursuing me, always loving me, and for never changing or shifting in any way at all. Thank You for the opportunity to go to Africa and my time there, and the same for South Africa specifically. Thank You for bringing me to Waco (against my wildest imaginations). Thank You for all the difficulties over the past year or two and for Your discipline in my life. Thank You that nothing is wasted with You. Thank You that You have always brought me through. Thank You that Your word never returns void. Thank You that You are the Yes and Amen. Thank You for life. Thank You for the things you will bring about. And thank You for all the little things I so easily take for granted, from a bed and blankets and pillow, clothing, electricity, plumbing, senses that work, legs to walk, hands and fingers, "my hair"... and hot running water.
Thursday, November 24, 2016
Saturday, November 5, 2016
Don't Worry About What You'll Eat...What You'll Wear - Part 2
At some point in my life, I decided I needed to give some attention
to what I was eating. The college and early-20s lifestyle of eating
mainly fast food, processed food, lots of sweets (I have a sweet tooth),
and drinking lots of soda just wasn't working for me. Or my
waistline. Diets come and go (and the pounds go and come with and
without them), so I knew it had to be a lifestyle change. So I started
learning to eat more healthy and started learning how to cook.
There are so many, many differing ideas about diet and eating habit. There's the super-healthy fitness crowd that tries to eat "clean", lean diets of high protein and fruits and veggies, but low carbs, fat, and sugar. There's the vegetarian group, the pescatarian (vegetarian + fish) group, and the vegan group. There's the revolving diet group, and then there's the group that's been blessed enough to never have to think about it. There's banting, paleo, gluten free, Atkins, Isagenics, Juice Plus, diet pills, and I don't even know what else. And some have landed in the camp of: Eat whatever, it's all from God, it can't make you fat, and if it does you need to stand in faith that it won't harm you and it's fine. (This goes along with the verse, "You will drink/eat poison and it won't harm you.")
And there is probably something that is true in all of these different things, otherwise they wouldn't work for anyone at all. But there's always someone who swears by each of them.
I've landed in the camp of: If God made it, it's probably safe to eat (unless, you know, it's poisonous mushrooms in the back yard). Eating giving at least a little consideration to what I eat falls into the realm of taking care of what God gave me. I want to make good choices, but I don't want it to have a controlling factor in my life. I'm free to eat anything, but I'm also free to say no to it all. Including the ice cream I tend to over indulge in when traveling or after moving...
Most of us do worry about what we eat. Maybe not in the way that Jesus talked about it. That was a literal, "I wonder if I'm going to eat tomorrow. What am I going to do? How can I buy or find food for tomorrow??" We worry about how it's going to make us fat. Or sick. Or somehow unhealthy. So if I pay attention to what I eat, it's because I want to be a good steward of the body God has given me, and I want it to last. If I had a car (incidentally, I don't right now), I would take it in for regular oil changes, put gas in it at appropriate times, clean it off to keep it in good working order. That's what I want to do with my body.
When it comes to taking care of our bodies, healthcare and dealing with sickness becomes a major issue as well. And we see every ideology from, "It's all doctors," to "God uses doctors" then "I only use what's natural" and all the way to "I don't have to take anything ever because I have God who will heal me." The theological intricacies are above my pay grade, but I know God cares about my health, I know He doesn't want me to be sick, and I know He can do anything and use anything for my healing. My only job is to hear His voice and follow Him.
Before I moved to Africa, I'd been sick about once in 6 years. I lived with people who were sick every month, and in the 2 1/2 years in their house, I didn't get sick once. My immune system was rocking it! I went to South Africa. During those 7 weeks, almost everyone got sick but me. And then I went to Mozambique. Most everyone had...bowel issues, but I was fine. But by July I'd been eating mainly cheap pasta and rice with little nutritional value, limited amounts of fruits, veg, and protein. Just bread, pasta, rice, repeat. And Moz is dirty, and dusty, and the dust blows everywhere so that you breathe it. You're around hundreds of people in less-than-clean conditions. I started coughing. After a week in Madagascar, I had literally the worse cold I'd ever had in my life. It turned into full-on sinus infection, double ear infections, and coughing up stuff that shouldn't come out of your lungs. My head was a constant, pounding drum. The Hulk is green on the outside. I was green on the inside. It was horrible. I even cried.
Normally I try to avoid taking drugs. Not this time. I was trying to get a hold of some good drugs to kill everything that was trying to kill me. This head and chest infect of doom returned every 2-3 months as an unwelcomed visitor that just wouldn't leave. I still had the mentality of, "I do not get sick," which I'd lived in for 6 years. But my body didn't care in the slightest about my mentality. Sickness didn't care about my faith. It was angry. And it would be heard. Every. Single. 2-3. Months.
While amazing things were happening in Africa, there was also a lot of stress and pressure around me, which can take its toll on a person's health (did you know health issues are often common place with missionaries?). A couple friends encouraged me to take, and pushed, vitamins. I reluctantly started taking those silly vitamins in January of this year. And I started getting more sleep. In addition to eating a little bit better over the last year. And you know what? This year, I've only been sick once for about a week. And it wasn't that bad. The sinus infection of doom and destruction wasn't able to sink it's nasty (really, really, super nasty!) claws into me. A nursing friend of mine always says, "Aspirin retards the virus!" So when I started feeling a little funny, I'd start taking an Aspirin every day, up my vitamin C, and be fine. That's happened 3-4 times. Woo-hoo!
Now, I'm still not a huge fan of drugs. But you know, I'm not a huge fan of being sick 50% of the time either, and I'll use the things God has made available to give my abused immune system a boost until it's recovered again. I don't plan to be on the vitamin and aspirin regimen forever. But right now I have the means to purchase these things, God has made them available, and I'm thankful.
And I'll let myself enjoy some ice cream every now and then.
There are so many, many differing ideas about diet and eating habit. There's the super-healthy fitness crowd that tries to eat "clean", lean diets of high protein and fruits and veggies, but low carbs, fat, and sugar. There's the vegetarian group, the pescatarian (vegetarian + fish) group, and the vegan group. There's the revolving diet group, and then there's the group that's been blessed enough to never have to think about it. There's banting, paleo, gluten free, Atkins, Isagenics, Juice Plus, diet pills, and I don't even know what else. And some have landed in the camp of: Eat whatever, it's all from God, it can't make you fat, and if it does you need to stand in faith that it won't harm you and it's fine. (This goes along with the verse, "You will drink/eat poison and it won't harm you.")
And there is probably something that is true in all of these different things, otherwise they wouldn't work for anyone at all. But there's always someone who swears by each of them.
I've landed in the camp of: If God made it, it's probably safe to eat (unless, you know, it's poisonous mushrooms in the back yard). Eating giving at least a little consideration to what I eat falls into the realm of taking care of what God gave me. I want to make good choices, but I don't want it to have a controlling factor in my life. I'm free to eat anything, but I'm also free to say no to it all. Including the ice cream I tend to over indulge in when traveling or after moving...
Most of us do worry about what we eat. Maybe not in the way that Jesus talked about it. That was a literal, "I wonder if I'm going to eat tomorrow. What am I going to do? How can I buy or find food for tomorrow??" We worry about how it's going to make us fat. Or sick. Or somehow unhealthy. So if I pay attention to what I eat, it's because I want to be a good steward of the body God has given me, and I want it to last. If I had a car (incidentally, I don't right now), I would take it in for regular oil changes, put gas in it at appropriate times, clean it off to keep it in good working order. That's what I want to do with my body.
When it comes to taking care of our bodies, healthcare and dealing with sickness becomes a major issue as well. And we see every ideology from, "It's all doctors," to "God uses doctors" then "I only use what's natural" and all the way to "I don't have to take anything ever because I have God who will heal me." The theological intricacies are above my pay grade, but I know God cares about my health, I know He doesn't want me to be sick, and I know He can do anything and use anything for my healing. My only job is to hear His voice and follow Him.
Before I moved to Africa, I'd been sick about once in 6 years. I lived with people who were sick every month, and in the 2 1/2 years in their house, I didn't get sick once. My immune system was rocking it! I went to South Africa. During those 7 weeks, almost everyone got sick but me. And then I went to Mozambique. Most everyone had...bowel issues, but I was fine. But by July I'd been eating mainly cheap pasta and rice with little nutritional value, limited amounts of fruits, veg, and protein. Just bread, pasta, rice, repeat. And Moz is dirty, and dusty, and the dust blows everywhere so that you breathe it. You're around hundreds of people in less-than-clean conditions. I started coughing. After a week in Madagascar, I had literally the worse cold I'd ever had in my life. It turned into full-on sinus infection, double ear infections, and coughing up stuff that shouldn't come out of your lungs. My head was a constant, pounding drum. The Hulk is green on the outside. I was green on the inside. It was horrible. I even cried.
Normally I try to avoid taking drugs. Not this time. I was trying to get a hold of some good drugs to kill everything that was trying to kill me. This head and chest infect of doom returned every 2-3 months as an unwelcomed visitor that just wouldn't leave. I still had the mentality of, "I do not get sick," which I'd lived in for 6 years. But my body didn't care in the slightest about my mentality. Sickness didn't care about my faith. It was angry. And it would be heard. Every. Single. 2-3. Months.
While amazing things were happening in Africa, there was also a lot of stress and pressure around me, which can take its toll on a person's health (did you know health issues are often common place with missionaries?). A couple friends encouraged me to take, and pushed, vitamins. I reluctantly started taking those silly vitamins in January of this year. And I started getting more sleep. In addition to eating a little bit better over the last year. And you know what? This year, I've only been sick once for about a week. And it wasn't that bad. The sinus infection of doom and destruction wasn't able to sink it's nasty (really, really, super nasty!) claws into me. A nursing friend of mine always says, "Aspirin retards the virus!" So when I started feeling a little funny, I'd start taking an Aspirin every day, up my vitamin C, and be fine. That's happened 3-4 times. Woo-hoo!
Now, I'm still not a huge fan of drugs. But you know, I'm not a huge fan of being sick 50% of the time either, and I'll use the things God has made available to give my abused immune system a boost until it's recovered again. I don't plan to be on the vitamin and aspirin regimen forever. But right now I have the means to purchase these things, God has made them available, and I'm thankful.
And I'll let myself enjoy some ice cream every now and then.
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